 Sometimes a journey starts before we notice we are on it. Such was the case as I walked my personal journey to self-awareness. Eventually, I couldn’t help but notice. It happened when I was studying to become a Master Empowerment Coach. At the time, I was scared, depressed, disabled, unemployed, broke and broken. I have been searching for answers and a way out of the horrible circumstances I found myself in after an unexpected job loss and subsequent car accident in 2008 (but there was more, so much more). In the midst of trying to survive and regain physical and mental strength, in July of 2011, a dear friend sent me a link to an incredible coaching program. As I looked at the curriculum tears streamed down my face; in an instant, I felt so connected. I was inspired, filled with hope, and sure this was the right thing for me. The course looked amazing, full of great material, personal development, coaching tools, and study topics specifically aimed at becoming uniquely qualified to work with women. I took out my last credit card and decided to roll perhaps the biggest dice of my life. I enrolled!  I had no idea I was about to embark on a journey of a lifetime. A journey to self-discovery and healing I could not have imagined. I would experience self-discovery of transformational depth which led me to uncover the imposter I was in my own life. As I discovered, this imposter was my wounded five-year-old self who used to be referred to as half-orphan after my father passed away when I was just, well, five. Yes, ‘half-orphan’ was a label my Polish culture used to describe someone like me: a child with only one living parent. Growing up all I heard was “Oh, she’s a poor, fatherless child; what a hard life she’ll have; it’s not easy for a girl with no father, poor little girl, half-orphan.” The feeling of pity was palpable and somehow, in my young mind, I created this ‘truth’ that I wasn’t whole, a belief that something in me was missing. In my mind, this meant I was half as smart, half as capable, half as worthy, and half as deserving. This was my subconscious story of who I was until my teacher and founder of The S.W.A.T. Institute, Crystal Andrus Morissette, said one word… As I was going through the course, during a guided meditation, she listed some words; one of them was “unimportant”. Instantly, I began to sob. In that moment, I became aware that this was the reason for most of my life’s struggles – I believed myself to be UNIMPORTANT. It summarized my story. I was jolted into awareness, pulled out of the way I perceived myself, my life, and everyone and everything in it. In that moment, I discovered the imposter, the half-orphan who was running my life by holding the beliefs of who I was, who I could be, and who I could not be. This helped me realize that, since I wasn’t one hundred percent whole, I never allowed myself to receive any more than half of anyone or anything. That realization was TRANSFORMATIONAL!!!  That transformation helped me find my ‘other half.’ What I needed was guidance and a safe space to gradually, gently, and courageously, peel back the layers and find the rest of me, the Real Me. And to remember the truth of who I was which made me whole again. I finally remembered MySelf. If you don’t know who you are people will tell you who you should be and you will believe them. Please don’t! Look for the truth you knew before ‘they’ told you a different story and before you talked yourself into believing it. And as you look, I promise you, you will find yourself to be far greater than that story. And as for me, today and every day, my Self-Awareness Journey continues… Do you have a personal story of becoming self-aware? If so, please share in the comments below. Thank you and may you have a blessed journey. 
3 Comments
The mind is a funny place that occupies no space. Curiously enough, it holds the space in which we create our life’s experiences. And in that space, two main characters are at play: Love & Fear – the perfect expressions of duality, the illustration of good and bad, the contrast between light and darkness. As first expressed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, there are only two emotions: love and fear. Or, as she pointed out, there can either be love or fear because we cannot feel both at the same time. And as I poetically add: it’s either one or the other that has the stage, as it’s only one we can engage.  Have you ever worried about something, wished you’d stop the worrying, but just couldn’t? You know why? It was because, then, fear had the stage. Fear is caused by the anticipation or the awareness of danger or pain. Danger can be real or perceived and pain can be physical or emotional. Either way, in our mind, we believe that something we won't like or do not wish for is imminent, therefore, we fear its arrival. We fear it will bring danger or pain or both. It is the grand precursor to worry, a state of mind full of unease and anxiety in which we make mental attempts to avoid what we believe is coming. Worry can be just bothersome or paralyzing; I’m familiar with both. For many years, I’ve been lost in the labyrinth of fear, worry, and more fear. Yes, it compounds as we ruminate and rehearse the worst case scenarios and play out the awful what-ifs. The world gets darker, the options get fewer, and the way out of that labyrinth fades into the thick fog of doom. Next, we find ourselves in the grips of that fear holding us in place, stuck in the worry where doors of possibility are shut. "What if this doesn't work out?" "What if I lose my job?" "What if I run out of money?" The reason we remain stuck in fear is because we don't answer those questions. Instead, we pace the labyrinth of worry. Not knowing, or remembering, that the moment we even attempt to answer them is the birth of change. Enter Curiosity... …that strong need to know more, to go deeper. The insatiable desire to learn, to investigate, to unveil a new discovery, a breakthrough leading to a consideration of another possibility... Curiosity has the power to move you forward, to guide you out of unbearable circumstances looming in that dense fog. It holds the power to transform unfulfilled dreams, impossible odds, and painful outcomes. It creates a path away from the anticipation of danger or pain, of loss or disappointment. That is exactly what curiosity has done for me, over and over again. “What if it doesn’t work out?” whispers fear, never allowing the answer to emerge from the darkness, thus remaining on the stage firmly. “I wonder how this will work out?” is curiosity’s connotation. Do you notice a shift? Can you feel the difference? I hope you can because this is curiosity creating possibility and opening doors before unseen. Doors through which light can enter just enough for hope to emerge – finally! Finally crossing over to the space of peace and wonder. That space we innately know as Love. Your mind is yours to serve YOU. Your thoughts are YOURS to direct in the story of your life as you engage the characters that will play the lead roles. Curiosity is a beautiful gift. Use it to connect worry to possibility. As a conduit between fear and love. Love, where all good things are possible. Now, just for fun, consider this thought…  What do you think? Please share and comment below. Much LOVE to you, Marta  So, how was your 2015? As you think of the answer, what comes to mind first? I can tell you that for most people it’s a list of everything that went wrong, things they didn’t accomplish, and dreams unfulfilled. Followed by a list of things and people to blame for it. I say let's change that this year! Let’s instead make a list of all that went right, focus on all the miracles that have happened. I am sure you had some miracles come your way as we all do in some form. I say, let’s notice all that you have accomplished, especially the things you did not plan on but have done anyway. Let’s think of all the valuable lessons you’ve learned and all the joy you’ve experienced. How does this feel? You see, we can sit there and reflect on what didn’t work or on what did work. We can try to explain why things went wrong and who or what to blame for it or we can acknowledge ourselves for making it to today, the last year of the year, and having a chance to try it all again next year. As I look back I see so much goodness; amazing friends, new and old; incredible lessons I have learned, even though some of them I really had to look for. But the important thing is that I found them. And I can tell you this, too: the more I had to search for them in the tough, dark moments, the more amazing and valuable they were. And I’m grateful. The best part of this is that I realize how much I UNLEARNED. How many true miracles I have experienced and how many beautiful things so many wonderful people expressed to me. I want to remember all the inspired moments I was blessed to enjoy; sunsets and sunrises, days in the woods, wisdom to have realized, and so many beautiful words that spilled onto the pages of my notebooks (I have yet to share). But enough about me.  Please know how much I want for you to feel and remember all the beauty that you have experience this past year. All the joyful moments, laughter, songs you favoured, people you’ve held and kissed, and touched with your heart. The smiles you’ve shared, even those unreturned. The delicious meals you had, the friends you made, the hot summer days, the crisp foggy mornings of Fall that smelled so fresh! All the moments when you felt so good about yourself, all the times you’ve exceeded your own expectations, what you did, and how you did it. I know for sure there were some. Let your memory take you back to all those awesome moments you loved and enjoyed so much and feel them with every cell of your body. Then allow this energy to fill your entire Being and know it’s yours anytime you want it. And I invite you to take all of that into your future. There are many fantastic ways and rituals to experience life in a new way. Here are some ideas: 1. Keep a gratitude journal. 2. Make a weekly list of all the miracles that graced your life. 3. Have a jar or some closed container which you fill with little notes of accomplished goals, things you’re grateful for, wishes fulfilled, etc. You get to design this as you like. 4. List the things you want to accomplish in the New Year and every morning or, at least every week, meditate on those things and feel the feeling of accomplishing them. 5. Expect Miracles and they WILL show up! Guaranteed! 6. Cut yourself some slack. You deserve it. 7. Honor yourself, all the things you have done, and obstacles you've overcome. YOU are AWESOME! May 2016 be Your Best Year Ever and may You be able to Live Your Life Your Way!
Please share and leave a comment below. Thank you so much! Blessings, Marta  Imagine: A long time ago, on a beautiful sunny day far, far away a little boy was born. His mother did all she could to take really good care of him. But his father did not allow her to show much affection, to hold him the way he needed it be held or to whisper love into his little heart. The father, a righteous man, took pride in himself and his young son wishing him to grow up to be just like he was: passionate and devoted to his beliefs, country, and religion. He was convinced that all he did was right and so his little boy was taught to think the same way. His mother lived in fear not only for her life but the lives of her husband and son alike. She and her sister shared the same fate, a life of living in fear and uncertainty; fulfilling her duties and suffering in silence, while watching her son become like his father. She remembers times when her little boy would question his father about some of his teachings, but the father could only offer punishment for the boy’s curiosity. The son’s only duty was to obey his father. One day, as the boy began to pick himself up off the floor, his lip bleeding, his gaze found his mother’s terrified eyes. His face expressed fear, confusion, and submission. After this time, the boy never questioned his father again. Though he still often wondered about his life, reasons it was this way, and the actions he was forced to take. Eventually, his wondering was replaced with stern commands, confusion turned to resignation, and his fear and submission became his rage. Can you love this boy? Imagine: A girl strapping on explosives, embarking on a mission. She’s been told it’s her surest way to salvation. Throughout the 16 years of her life, she’s been taught that she was chosen for a very important mission. Her life has a special meaning and God himself has chosen her for this mission. She feels honored. She is the chosen one. She shall attain the ultimate goal. Or, perhaps, she is overcome by fear so great she can’t speak, or think, or breathe at times. Perhaps she has been abused into submission. Perhaps she knows this mission is her only way out of having to live the way she had to. So she goes out and detonates. Can you love this girl? Imagine: A mother heartbroken and helpless as her boy grows in rage and her daughter completes her God-appointed mission. All she has left now is the husband who is even more righteous and even more proud and who, once, was just like his little boy. She looks over at her sister; they both feel the same pain, the same hopelessness, the same sorrow, the same emptiness. Can you love this mother? Imagine: You find yourself living in a place where the only information you have access to is what you see or hear in the immediate area. Try to imagine actually having to live such a life where most of what you hear is criticism, fault finding, and condemnation. And you have no way of knowing anything different. If there is a school, it teaches you exactly the same as what you hear at home with extra emphasis on hate and punishment. You learn how to use weapons as soon as you can carry one. You are told that there is a world out the, beyond the horizon, full of bad people who worship wrong, live wrong, think wrong, say the wrong things, like the wrong things. Essentially, everything they do is wrong. But the wrongest of it all is that they hate you and they are on a mission to destroy you and everything you know, believe, and trust. Can you feel yourself living this life? Can you love yourself there? Now… Imagine: Your heart opening so wide with love it can contain the entire world in its expanded space. Imagine your love being so vast it can wrap itself around every person who knows no love. Imagine your compassion to be so deep it can wash over every pain ever felt and heal every sorrow ever experienced. I think you can. I know I want to. Imagine now closing your eyes, putting your hands on your heart and feeling it beating to the rhythm of life within you, the same rhythm that beats in the heart of that father… Imagine…loving your enemy.  Please join me in opening my heart, bowing my head, and praying for those who don't know how to love; those who don’t know how to respect their own lives nor the lives of others; those who kill innocent human beings due only to their ignorance.
Love does heal and all we need now is to love, especially those who seem unlovable. You can join this prayer project by adding your prayer, as often as you can and wish, using #compassionateprayerproject or by commenting on our Facebook page here or at https://www.facebook.com/compassionateprayerproject/  “Home is where the heart is” goes the saying. What do you think of when you think ‘home’? It’s family, right? What else. Today, several small circumstances collectively pointed me directly to my heart and to the conclusion that family is like a home for the heart. If you don’t have a family (one that feels like family) your heart can feel homeless at times. I know this because that is exactly how I felt as I considered this. When we move away from our birth or first family, whether across the country or across the ocean, the feeling is the same. It is in seeing others gather in celebration that we notice just how big the hole is, you know the one I mean. Mine was made when I left a piece of my heart with my birth family; it has not yet been filled. We may have joined new families, but if we don’t feel like we belong, whatever the reasons, we feel sad, alone, unclaimed. I thought a lot about this and my feelings, my circumstances, and the reasons. I even pointed my finger a time or two (okay, maybe a 100 times), though privately in my head; but then I realized that sometimes in life it’s not the people or the circumstances that are most important. What’s really important are the lessons, either new ones learned or old ones unlearned. That’s what truly matters. The people and circumstances may only be here to provide the opportunities we need to encounter the lessons – learning, cradled in free will, is optional.  To fully experience life and its lessons is to live the full gamut of life. It’s like playing all the keys on the piano, not just one or two. Some can only play a few notes, maybe even just one, and all they can do in a lifetime is to learn to not lean on it quite so hard. But we must not judge as we don’t know why that is. Maybe it’s that soul’s journey to assist in the journey of another. Perhaps it’s to guide that homeless heart back where it belongs…  Some of us are those souls who experience the full range of life’s notes as deeply as they come. There are times I feel great compassion for those who can’t love me. But there are also times when I feel angry that they don’t, so l lean hard on that note only to find the key of sorrow. Eventually, slowly, I begin to remember the whole gamut I have been blessed with and so I start, again, to work my way through it, all the way back to compassion right next to understanding. And I comfortably lean on that key, until next time, when my heart feels homeless again. And so I begin the same journey yet again; I go around the same bend, only this time it doesn’t take as long, I don’t lean on anger and sorrow as hard, and before I know it I’m back at compassion and understanding reaching bravely toward forgiveness. I begin to want to lean on that key and, tired, I rest there for a long while. Then, suddenly, quietly, I realize I have found a home for my heart once I stepped over the threshold of forgiveness. Finally and safely, my heart returned home to love. It is the brave souls who dare to hit all the keys; it is the most courageous ones who gather all their notes and assemble them into a melody which then becomes their song. And, once ready, they sing it for the world.  Has your heart ever felt homeless? Please share as I would love to know your story. Blessings as always, Marta Designing Your Success The #1 most important step you need to take. Much has been said about success in recent years, courses have been taught and entire books have been written about how to achieve it. I, myself, have studied the topic, most recently with Jack Canfield, a well-known expert on the subject. But then I realized that, although a lot has been said about what actions to take and the steps involved in taking them, one important piece has been missing; a step that is crucial while starting any journey: defining its meaning and purpose for YOU (beyond the obvious). As you may know, there are many different types and definitions of success, each expressed by individual perspectives, goals and desires which may vary greatly. What remains constant is that in order to be truly successful - whatever form that takes - we must first have a clear picture and understanding of the most basic, fundamentally distinctive definition of success as we see it and as it applies to our circumstances. Practical Steps In Designing The Success You Want Do you know your definition of success? You see, awareness is everything! Sometimes, just getting out of bed is a success, right? We achieve various levels and types of success as we journey through life and its many stages. It can change as we change and as our priorities shift. As you embark on designing the fullest expression of your success, I invite you to start by taking this very important step in answering the following questions: 1. How do I define success? 2. What are my criteria for defining it? 3. What is(are) my measure(s) of success? 4. How much success can I accomplish? 5. How much success do I deserve? For some of us, the highest expression of success is being a good mom, becoming a best-selling author, or having a healthy, vital body. The spectrum is dynamic for different people as well as individually. Knowing where you are on that spectrum is instrumental to your design. Why? Because you, quite simply, must know this so as to not measure yourself against some else's definition of what it means to be successful. I must admit, until recently, I did not have a clear definition of my own success in my current venture and maybe that's when I realized the importance of those questions. The fact is you can't reach your destination if you don't know exactly where you're going. There are other questions to be considered - though the above are a great starting point! Allow the dominoes of your inner wisdom to fall and strike that next place within to lead you to the most authentic conclusions. They are all in ‘there’. If you would like to work with me or to simply find out more about me and my services, click here. There might be a complementary session in your future (wink, wink). With permission, I have shared Jack Canfield's wisdom on success in last month's blog; you can check it out here. To Your Success!   This month, I draw on the wisdom of an amazing man who is the perfect example of a successful individual. Earlier this month, I had the pleasure of being coached by Jack Canfield while he was the featured guest on my Your Year Of Miracles mentoring adventure with Marci Shimoff and Debra Poneman, the 2015 addition. What a blessing this is!
Following, is just about the entire article Jack wrote recently; I feel it's full of great advice that is solid, practical, and easy to implement. I KNOW you will find it helpful! (Image source: Google images) "In this article, I share seven of my top strategies for getting things done. Strategy #1: Get Clear About What’s Required When people set goals, particularly at the beginning of the year when working on their New Year’s resolutions, they tend to be overly optimistic about how much is actually possible. As a result, they over-commit or make lists that are far too long. I’ve fallen into this trap before. I’ve learned that to be realistic, I must take the time to break goals down and ask, “What would actually be required for me to achieve this goal? How many hours would that take?” Once I have a list of activities and estimates of the time needed to achieve each item, I pull out my calendar and start scheduling all the activities. This is the point when you come face to face with reality. If you realize that there’s not enough time in the day to accomplish everything you want, it’s time to go back and prioritize your goals. Once you’ve identified the things that are most important to accomplish, schedule the activities that those goals will require, and set aside the rest of your goals for later. Strategy #2: Create a Daily Schedule Simply setting aside time in your calendar may not be enough to achieve your goals. I go the extra step and create a daily schedule. Additionally, I use the Rule of 5. Each day I choose 5 specific tasks that will move me toward the completion of my goals and I ensure those tasks are included in my daily schedule. Daily use of the Top 5 Priority Action post-its can help keep your daily task list front and center. So if one of my daily tasks is to work on my book, I don’t simply say, “I’ll work on my book today” – I actually designate the hours that I’ll work on my book. This has been an essential step in ensuring that things actually get done. To stay motivated, I review my yearly goals once a week, and then I plan my week around those goals. I identify what I need to accomplish in the coming week to achieve my long-term goals, and then I book those activities into my calendar. Each evening before I leave my office, I finalize my schedule for the following day. When I walk in each morning, I can be productive immediately rather than wasting precious time figuring out what I’m going to do. Strategy #3: Focus on the "Big Rocks" When planning my daily schedule, sometimes I realize that I have an unreasonable amount of work on my to-do list for the next day. I know that I can’t get it all done. This is when I turn to my list of “Big Rocks” – my most important priorities. (If you are not familiar with the terminology, “Big Rocks” comes from Dr. Stephen Covey’s method of time management. I suggest doing an internet search of Covey demonstrating his approach if you have not yet seen it.) I keep my Big Rocks in a list on my iPad. The Big Rocks are the things I need to get done this quarter. When my daily schedule is overbooked, the Big Rocks are the things that get done. Strategy #4: Center and Visualize I start each day with a meditation to help me get grounded. Before I get up from my meditation cushion, I mentally rehearse my day, visualizing and feeling myself staying focused, working efficiently, and being productive. This helps to activate the Law of Attraction, lining up the inner and outer resources to make my day go smoothly. Throughout the day, I do “refreshers.” Periodically throughout the day, I’ll close my eyes and focus on my breathing for a few minutes. This helps to center me and restore a sense of calm. In addition, whenever I begin a new segment on my schedule, I’ll take a few seconds to visualize that section of my day going smoothly. When sitting down to write, I’ll visualize my writing going well. When I prepare to make phone calls, I’ll visualize my conversations going well and achieving the desired results. Strategy #5: Keep Score To stay on track to achieve goals, it’s important to keep score. This means assessing, each day, whether or not you’ve done what was necessary to achieve your goals. For score-keeping to be effective, you must have your goals and score-keeping tool somewhere where you’re going to see it. If you can’t easily see your score, you can’t reasonably assess where you are. There are a number of ways to keep score. When you were little, your parents or teachers may have helped you keep score with a sticker chart, where you’d get a sticker every time you kept your commitment to do your homework, for example. Some adults find that this approach is still effective. You could also use a simple checklist that lists your various to-do items and deadlines. Checking each item off as it’s completed can be powerful. I’ve also discovered that there are several phone apps that work well for keeping score. If your smartphone is a constant companion, it would be a wise move to put your scorekeeping on your phone so it’s always handy. One of my favorite apps is Don’t Break the Chain, designed with the Jerry Seinfeld motivation technique. Jerry Seinfeld wanted to write a book, so he put a big red X every day through the calendar when he actually wrote. He didn’t want to break the chain of red X’s, hence the name Don’t Break the Chain. (Click here for a list of apps reviewed by About.com.) Strategy #6: Celebrate Milestones Celebrating your progress along the way is essential to staying motivated. If you set a goal that takes nine months to achieve, it’s hard to stay motivated the entire time because there’s no payoff. So build in milestones to celebrate along the way. If your goal is to lose weight, celebrate every two pounds you lose. If you’re writing a book, celebrate every 20 pages that you write. If your goal is to book 35 speaking gigs, celebrate every 5 engagements that you book. Celebrating milestones keeps you inner child excited because it feels rewarded for all of the efforts it’s made. Strategy #7: Schedule Down Time When you’re on fire to achieve your goals, it’s tempting to skip free time. (This is when you often hear people say, “I’ll rest when I’m dead.”) However, when you deny yourself free time, you get tired. You become less efficient. You make poorer decisions and are less creative. Your inner child can get resentful of the demanding pace, and it becomes easy to get burned out. That’s why I plan free time into my schedule to rest and rejuvenate. My friend Dan Sullivan of The Strategic Coach, Inc., taught me to schedule three types of days into my calendar. Focus Days are primetime for work. Buffer Days are for practice, preparation and miscellaneous details, such as dental appointments or getting caught up on email. Free Days are the third type of day. They’re 24-hour periods dedicated to resting and recharging. I’ve found that scheduling Free Days have resulted in a greater level of passion, creativity and energy in my work. Your goals are important – not only to you and your family, but to the world. You have a purpose, and your goals are how you are meant to live your purpose. The seven strategies I’ve shared here have been essential to my ability to get things done. Use them to ensure that when 2015 comes to an end, you’re celebrating the accomplishment of your goals, rather than regretting what hasn’t happened." Jack Canfield, America's #1 Success Coach, founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul®and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you're ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.FreeSuccessStrategies.com I hope you enjoyed this post and if you have any questions or comments please share below. I also invite you to be courageous enough to share you space with other brilliant people! Here is to our success!!! Marta :)  I love my mind and how it cascades into its own limitlessness; taking me places I have never been, unveiling points of view never before seen. “Are you saying that you gonna start dressing up like a lady all the time?” “My whole life I’ve been dressing up as a man; this is me.” This is a dialogue between two characters in an award-winning TV series, Transparent. The answer provided by the second character struck a chord with me to a point of tears and triggered a cascade of thoughts, solidifying some, and inspiring new ones. Have you ever considered what life must be like for those who are gay, transsexual, transgender, or in any other way different? What it must be like to live in a world where how you see yourself or are seen, does not match what you feel about who you are? Think about this for a moment. Imagine: what would it be like to realize that your anatomy does not line up with who you feel yourself to be? What would it feel like to have to alter the way you express yourself to the world around you – all the time? Really take this in. What life must be like when you’re not able to be yourself? What must it be like for so many people to live a life that's not theirs? And can you imagine knowing that being yourself, your true essence, is perceived by most people as being wrong, unacceptable, or worse? And there is nothing you can do about it; not about the way you are nor the way you are perceived and judged. Do you begin to understand? Silently, I asked myself those questions and sat with them for awhile as my heart filled with great compassion and my eyes filled with tears. And then, I asked another question: what is the deeper intention and meaning for this human experience so many people go through? For something to be so different than the customary norm, there has to be a grand reason. The answer came swiftly: it is to teach us one of the most profound forms of acceptance. Feeling accepted is one of the basic needs of any human being and most of us struggle in this area in varying degrees. This is why we ought to be able to understand what it feels like to be deemed unacceptable. But so often we don’t, or we pretend we don’t; we choose ridicule over compassion, judgement over acceptance. Acceptance doesn’t mean agreement with or reverence of, it simply means the allowing of being. It is so much easier and natural to allow than to reject. Everyone and everything that is is here for a reason. We often hear the question ‘what is the purpose of life?’ There are many ways to answer it, though I have come to believe that, fundamentally, it is to expand human consciousness so that it elevates to meet Divine Consciousness, and we all play a part in that expansion. Today, as I pondered the more meaningful purpose of those who are gay and transgender, I have profound respect and deep gratitude for their life experiences, their role and contribution to that expansion, as well as for providing us with such an amazing opportunity to practice acceptance. And I say THANK YOU! Those who teach us the greatest lessons, who sacrifice and suffer greatest pain, are some of the most courageous Souls to have graced humanity. Acceptance brings with it a bounty of gifts, not the least of which are humility, love, and compassion. The way I see our collective life journey is this: we are all reading the same book; we’re just on different chapters. Transparent means letting light pass through without distortion. Let there be acceptance. Let there be light. Let there be love. Let there be peace. I dedicate this post to every person traveling this path. Anyone from Lee Daniels, Ellen DeGeneres, Tom Daley, Lady Gaga, Lily Tomlin, Bruce Jenner to Adam Lambert, Greer Lankton and Chaz Bono, as well as every other person whose name we may never know. I hug you all with my heart. With love & acceptance,  What are your thoughts or opinions? Please share in the comments below.
 Life becomes a struggle the moment we believe that who and how we are is somehow wrong. We then commit ourselves to becoming right – big mistake!
I remember being a child and my mom asking me to clean up my desk and where I kept my school stuff. I vividly remember taking my time with it; reading every piece of paper with any notes on it, then taking more time to think about what was written. I would take ‘forever’ to go through everything while I made sure I did not throw out anything important! I truly enjoyed getting lost in reviewing, re-reading, thinking, re-thinking, and sometimes going on long journeys into the worlds in my mind, those incredible adventures full of peaceful mystery and delight… …and then I would hear my mom (love you mommy) yell at me, expressing her view of how slow, unproductive, and wrong was my way of doing the assigned task which should only have taken half an hour if I wasn’t so and so. Told enough times, I finally believed that I was so and so…and so, I began the journey away from that and toward being less slow, less unproductive, less wrong, less me. I’m sure most of us can relate to this story in some way. I’m also sure that, at least on some level, most of us know that life’s greatest struggle is not to be ourselves. We grow up believing that our way is the wrong way and in order to be right we need to find another way of being; otherwise, we’re just, well, no-good. We spend decades looking for that right way to be, proper thing to do to finally feel good, comfortable, and natural again only to realize that we had it at our disposal all along. We realize, with great sadness as in my case, that we have spent much of our life and time on denying our natural way of being. Well, today, I decided that I shall return to being who I am Naturally! I cease to make who or how I am wrong. I, once again, begin to do things MY WAY. The way that feels good, comfortable, and natural to ME! I have so many notes and writings to review and get lost in my mom would scream for a month if she saw it. Oh, this actually makes me laugh! Which brings me another point… Joy is the main ingredient in any sort of authentic success. When we are in joy we are in the recognition of our essence; it is in joy that we truly express who we are. Blessed be those who sent me on that wild goose chase, which was often joy-less, though filled with so much discovery, knowledge and wisdom, all I can be now is grateful. Earlier today, hours before I began to write what you are now reading, a phrase came to me that brought me to tears: Become the Gift of YOU. Coincidence? I think not! I am growing in my conviction that my Soul speaks to me through all those phrases I then turn into quotes…and they almost always come when I’m on a journey filled with peaceful mystery and delight… Today, I invite you to remember and embrace who you are NATURALLY. I know you know how that is; and let me assure you – how that is is perfect! I also know that as soon as you give yourself permission to become YOU again, you will be reassured as you continue to reclaim yourself. I suspect your Soul speaks to you, too. Listen.  This is a story of an everyday event which turned out to be a lovely exchange of courtesy and kindness. It could have been a story of how bothersome a flat tire can be. Instead, it is a story of how strangers came together to support each other just because they could… It all started when my neighbour asked me to drive him to the doctor’s office just a few blocks away. I said yes. Knowing my tire needed attension, I made sure it was inflated enough to make the short trip and while my neighbour went inside I went on to inflate it. As I approached it with my handy dandy compressor, I could hear the air escaping out – this was new! At that point I knew it was not a good thing. I suspected inflating the tire would not be possible so, reluctantly, I proceeded to put on the spare. I began the process by loosening the bolts and, as I was doing that, I saw a young man walking down the sidewalk. I briefly thought of asking him for help but concluded that he was too young to know stuff… In just a few moments I heard a voice say: "do you need any help?" I looked up and saw the same young man standing at an intersection about 30 feet away waiting for my answer. 'Wow! That’s awesome!' I thought. “If you don’t mind, I would love your help” I replied with relief in my voice. As it turned out, his dad is a car mechanic so, of course, he knew stuff! Never judge a book by its age, eh? Well, the car got jacked up, the bolts were all off…but the wheel would not come off as it was frozen in place (the car sat outside, undriven, for the past three and a half days). The young man called his dad for advice which was to turn that wheel all the way outward and kick it from the inside. The only tools we had were our arms and feet. So, I turned the wheels, he laid down on the snow (-17 C wind-chill; that's 1.4 F) and gave it his best shot; quite a few shots actually, with his boots to the wheel while I was pooling on the darn thing from the other side. No way was it going to come off!  I realised we could not do much more at that point and began to think how I was going to get my neighbour back home, who by this time watched us struggle for some 20 minutes. This is a man who always helps everyone else around, but due to his current condition all he could do was watch. During the pulling and kicking, I took notice of a car pulling into the back yard of a brick house directly across the street from where I was parked. So, with determination and a hopeful heart, I marched across the street and rang the doorbell. After just a few moments a lovely young woman, probably in her 30’s, opened the door and patiently listened to my story. In her face I saw kind eyes and a gentle smile. She said softly: “Just a moment; I will ask my husband”. When the door reopened her face was lit up as she told me her husband would drive my neighbour home. After a short while the car that only a few minutes ago arrived in the back yard was on the move again. The husband pulled around to the front street and, as I opened the passenger door to help my neighbour get in, I expressed my gratitude and appreciation of the fact that this man just got home (from work most likely) and was willing to get his boots and jacket right back on and do this favour for people he did not know. Later I found out that while he was playing chauffeur, he also played Christmas songs - just for my neighbour! In the meantime, I stayed with my disabled car and the young man who insisted on staying until all my stuff was put back in the trunk and the bolts were back on the deflated tire. Then he continued his journey to visit a friend, but not before he offered me a big hug and well-wishes! It was dark, cold, my hands were freezing as my gloves were wet, my thighs were getting that pinchy/stingy feeling from the cold wind, but my face was dressed in a big smile and my heart was filled with joy and amazement – none of the uncomfortable physical sensations mattered at all! My walk home was filled with concocting a way to show my appreciation to those lovely strangers who, so willingly, helped in a time of need on a cold winter's night - without hesitation! I was able to call the young man’s dad to tell him what a wonderful son he has raised. And there was a little gift and a card with a ‘thank you’ note delivered to the brick house across the street. Though, understandably, it can be difficult to see some times, we are surrounded by love, kindness, and generosity of spirit. All we need is to try to see it and eventually, invariably we will... The best things in life are those intangible gifts we can give to each other. And we don’t have to buy them in order to give them, they are always in stock, never out of date and the shipping is free…and the supply is endless. Truly, the Universe is filled with gifts for all; always and in all ways!  Wishing you many blessings, joy and gladness, and please share your story of intangible gifts in the comments below. Marta |
About the AuthorIn early Spring of 2011, as I sat with my journal at a family cabin, I felt the seed of my creative writing come through from beneath the surface. As I picked up my pen to begin my first journal entry, I felt a feeling of profound peace and indescribable comfort. All was well. I felt I was Home - finally! Archives
August 2023
Categories
All
|
RSS Feed
"Imagine now closing your eyes, putting your hands on your heart and feeling it beating to the rhythm of life within you, the same rhythm that beats in the heart of that father…
...Imagine…loving your enemy." |
|
"We are all reading the same book, we're just on different chapters." -Marta Stanczyk |
|
F r e e d o m
|
F l o w
|
F u l f i l l m e n t
|
© 2014 - 2025 Marta Stanczyk. All rights reserved. Privacy Policy
Disclaimer:
Any information provided through this website, WOMANTOWOMAN.CA, is offered as such - information only - and it is not offered as medical advice thus should not be considered as medical advice. Nothing presented on this website or in any of Marta Stanczyk’s offers, programs, and/or practices (i.e. meditations, coaching, EFT Tapping, TFT Tapping) is intended to be used for medical diagnosis or treatment, and is not intended to be a substitute for care or treatment by a qualified healthcare professional. Always consult your health practitioner/physician involving any medical concern, advice, condition, or treatment.
Any information provided through this website, WOMANTOWOMAN.CA, is offered as such - information only - and it is not offered as medical advice thus should not be considered as medical advice. Nothing presented on this website or in any of Marta Stanczyk’s offers, programs, and/or practices (i.e. meditations, coaching, EFT Tapping, TFT Tapping) is intended to be used for medical diagnosis or treatment, and is not intended to be a substitute for care or treatment by a qualified healthcare professional. Always consult your health practitioner/physician involving any medical concern, advice, condition, or treatment.